#395 Cannibal- Chuck Palahniuk
This story is most certainly Not Safe For Work due to sexual
conent. And if you’re sensitive to language and slurs, I’d also steer away from
this one. Although pointing out the disgusting and foul, things we say, think,
and do is sometimes the job of writers, that doesn’t mean we are always in the
mood to intake the onslaught of offensive language. However, as anyone who has
been to a public high school in say the last 50 years can attest, this is
actually kind of tame.
Cannibal is a loser, a seventh grade loner, over-sexed with
no girlfriend.
“Because his dad, old Mr. Cannibal, only ever watched the
Playboy Channel, and Mrs. Cannibal only liked the 700 Club, so it wasn’t lost
on their boy how sex stuff and Christian stuff both looked the same.”
Because he is in such low High School standing, one of the
school’s popular girls sees him as the perfect candidate, a low-risk
investment, to seduce him into performing a sexual act her boyfriend wants to
stay away from. As it turns out, Cannibal is surprisingly adapt at this
particular act, and becomes a kind of specialist as the “secret boyfriend” of
the school’s sexually oppressed female elite...until he gets too big for his
own reputation.
“He brags like his every word’s wearing sunglasses.”
